Funny...I remember identifying with Bernadine at a young age. If you mention Waiting to Exhale to me I will spout ALL her lines whether you want me to or not (ask my sister). Now I understand why I loved this character so much. Not only was she beautiful, classy and fierce, she was growing. She found herself broken and despondent and after her period of self-pity and even loathing maybe, she found her way back to sanity. I never wanted to burn up a luxury car, but something in Bernie's voice called to my spirit. She was reclaiming herself. She was realizing she was a whole person by her damn self. She had put her dream on hold for too long, taken disrespect for too long, and she lost her way. But my favorite part comes next...she figures it out. Not gracefully, obviously that garage sale didn't make any money, but hey, purge and process how you need to. Eventually though, Bernadine Harris emerged from the smoke victorious. And for that, as messy and beautiful as it was, she will always be my hero. Sometimes I don't feel whole, both physically and emotionally. My body has been broken. My peace has been shaken, but I am persistent. I find my way back every time, and one day I will make a home in the comfort of my completeness. I'm still figuring it out, but I make sure every week that my goals are going to lead me to that perfect peace. And I realize peace is not a destination, which is partially why I can keep putting one foot in front of the other every day. I'm not holding my breath waiting to be whole, I'm breathing in deeply and exhaling right this moment.
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